Have you ever paused to think about how often we, as women, have been nudged to step back and let others take the lead? It’s like there’s this old tape playing in the background, telling us to trust others’ opinions more than our own. Now, don’t get me wrong, there are absolutely some spaces where I have absolutely no desire to take the lead (insert all forms of hard labor), but even in that if something doesn’t feel right to me, I will speak up. I recognize that I have a voice and it’s safe for me to use it.
Today I am leaning into you trusting your own fabulous instincts. Shaking off those old deep-seated notions of dependency.
Throughout history, societal norms and expectations have often cast women in roles that foster dependence, whether consciously or subconsciously. From being encouraged to defer to others’ judgments to embodying roles that limit personal growth and self-reliance, women have navigated a landscape full of messages that undermine our autonomy.
It was almost like women had this invisible script: Be dependent, don’t ask too many questions, marry this person, and stick to the background. Whether it was in our homes, at work, or just about anywhere else, the message was clear—making choices for ourself was not the go-to look for us. But we’ve come a long way since then, right? Now we’re smashing glass ceilings, leading boardrooms, and making our voices heard. However, shedding the ingrained tendencies toward abdicating decision making responsibility can still be a significant challenge for many women.
Recognizing Dependency Patterns:
The first step toward embracing autonomy is recognizing the various forms of dependency that can show up. This could include financial dependency, seeking validation or decision-making approval from others, or emotional dependency in relationships. By identifying these patterns, you can begin to understand the underlying beliefs and behaviors that perpetuate dependency.
Building That Self-Trust Muscle:
- Get to Know You: Take time for introspection and to really understand your values, beliefs, and aspirations. Journaling, meditation, and mindfulness practices can be effective tools for developing a deeper self-connection.
- Question Those Doubts: Many dependency habits are rooted in self-doubt and limiting beliefs about your capabilities. By identifying and challenging these beliefs, you can start to shift your mindset toward one of trusting your own decisions.
- Develop Decision-Making Skills: Practice making small decisions on your own and gradually increase the stakes as your confidence grows. This can help build trust in your judgment and reduce the impulse to seek external validation. Start small. It’s all about building that trust from following your own advice.
- Seek Supportive Communities: Surround yourself with folks who get it, who cheer on your independence, and who inspire you to be your most authentic self. (YAY, CHI Community)
- Celebrate You: Acknowledge and celebrate your steps toward soul-inspired decision-making, no matter how small. This reinforces positive behavior and bolsters self-confidence.
Embarking on this journey from needing outside validation to trusting yourself is like embracing a whole new adventure. It’s about being patient and kind to yourself as you grow and flourish.
In my work, I’m passionate about helping you discern whether you’re acting out of old habits or true to your soul’s calling. This includes identifying if societal, ancestral, or deep-seated conditioning is holding you back. Interested in exploring more? Consider booking a 30 or 45-minute Akashic Record session with me, or join our 6-Week Self-Mastery and Empowerment Group!
Here’s to making your own path and trusting in the magic of your decisions. You’ve got this, and remember, in this community, I’m all about you